6 Things ItGirl is Thankful for This Holiday Season

It’s that time of year again– that in which temperatures drop, and the family you haven’t seen in 11 months has come to visit.

We know you’ve said what you’re thankful for, so here’s a list of what I’m thankful for:

My Family-

Mom, Dad, the whole fam. They’re there for me in sickness and in health, good and bad. They are my support, and pick me up when I fall. I’ve gotten to the point in my life where my parents are my friends. I’d also like to think I keep them young 😉

 My Friends-

The fam outside the fam. The squad. Whatever they’re referred to, they’re there in a heartbeat. Whether they live across the country, or in the same town I do. They’re there with ice cream and spoons for break ups, cheers for makeups, and always down to rule the school.

My Life [ Currently ] –

I am at a place where I am happy. The work I’m doing makes me happy. The people around me make me happy. I’ve fine tuned the things in my life to be the kind that make me happy. Cut that negativity out.

Little Quotes that Get Me through the Day –

When your mom telling you it’ll be alright isn’t enough, may Robin Williams saying it will be enough. I’m thankful for the powerful words of some of the most brilliant people in the world to keep me going.

Books –

When the going gets tough, the tough get going…. to another world that is. Books have always had my back. The days I have spent curled up enjoying the story of someone else’s life are countless. The worlds I have read about are never ending. Books have always been there to cheer me up.

My Brains* –

*and knowing how to use them.

I guess its a smart-ass way of saying I’m thankful for the educational opportunities that I have had. I’m thankful I have the ability to further my education. I’m thankful I’m smart. I haven’t always been, but being an adult now I can see that it really doesn’t matter what others think, if you’re taking care of you.

 

 

9 Things Every College Girl Didn’t Know She Needed

When you take the leap into college, you’re stepping into adulthood. So of course you’re stoked to meet your new roommate, and see your new place, and your things have been packed in boxes for almost a week. Before you pack the truck, here’s a few essentials every college girl didn’t know she needed:

1.Business Slacks

But in college, everyone wears sweats and maybe jeans, right? Wrong. You might find yourself needing to participate in a business casual event, or have a sudden interview for a position or a job. Your slacks should be in your closet, honey. The last thing you need is to run to the department store to find a pair the night before.

2.Red Lipstick

Not an everyday essential, per say, but you never know what you need it for. It adds a little pop of color to your outfit, and can be a nice touch when you’re going out with your friends. Every girl has a favorite red, and you should too.

3.A sewing kit (and enough sewing knowledge to sew a button)

Maybe you don’t sit at a sewing machine and whip out your own creations in your free time, but you do own pants, blouses, sweater, skirts, and jackets that have buttons. A needle and thread is all you need to stitch a popped button back on. You’re on your own now, and your mom won’t be able to fix the loose button on that sweater when you’re 2,000 miles from home.

4.Winter clothing

It doesn’t matter if you’re going to school in Michigan or California, every school has a climate with some cooler days. You want to be prepared (an not the girl wearing shorts on the first cold snap of the fall). If you live in a warmer climate, a few pairs of jeans, a good jacket, a scarf or two, and maybe a hat will get you through the winter. If you live at a school where it snows, thick jackets, scarves, hats, jeans, mittens, and possibly even long underwear are going to be your best friend for the winter.

5.A Blazer

Much like business slacks, you never know when you need one of these. Also, a blazer can take a casual outfit to dressy. It’s a flexible piece to have in your wardrobe.

6.Black Heels

Of course you have shoes for going out, but shimmering silver heels that are rhinestone crusted, and have a cute bow on them might not be the best idea for the meet and greet with the dean of your college.A basic pair of black heels can take you a long way from formal events to a date night.

7.Stain removers, to go

You never know what’s going to happen in the great wide world, but with this one, it’s not going to be stains. If you drip coffee on your shirt before class, this will be your go to. Makeup on your dress before a date? They’ve got it covered. It’s a great wide messy world, don’t be a victim of stains.

8.A bottle of Advil

Seems a little ridiculous, but hear me out. You never know when cramps might hit you, and you might be sitting in the center of the fourth row of a 300 person lecture hall. Lucky for you, you have a small bottle in your bag, and a water bottle. If you’re studying in the lib and feel a head ache coming on, it’s got your back. Even when a girl who is stranded and in need of an advil  approaches you, you can help her out.

9.An Umbrella

This one I’ve learned the hard way. When it rains here, it pours. And that might mean 3 outfit changes in a day. If you keep an umbrella in your bag, you’ll be ready to take on the day, rain or shine!

5 Books You Need to Read Before You Become a 20-Something

As an avid reader myself, I can say with much affection that reading has shaped my thoughts, feelings and behaviors. If you or a book lover in your life are looking for something to read, look no further. Not everyone has the hobby of reading, I get that, but here’s what you might be missing:

1.The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver

I read this book when I was in high school, and I must say it was my favorite book that I read from assigned reading lists. It’s worth reading the summary on the back cover of the book. The sorry follows a Missionary, his wife, and their 4 daughters as they travel from the United States to the Congo in the 1960s. The narrative of the story follows the trials and tribulations the family is put through as the father, Nathaniel is determined to convert the people of the Congo to Christianity.

The story has a religious background, and occasionally references stories from the bible. However, I find that for people of any faith it is a good read. The lessons the girls learn through watching their father try to convert the people of Congo prove to be stronger than the lessons they are taught by their mother from the bible.

The story focuses on the meaning of family, faith, and personal identity.

2.Yes Please by Amy Pohler

A book I had seen on the shelves of many bookstores. I finally wanted to have a treat yo self moment, and went to the store to buy the book. It was the book I never knew I needed. Amy Pohler– the beloved actress and comedian– so well known for her appearances on Saturday Night Live and as Leslie Knope on Parks and Recreation, was raw. She talks about her successes and failures in the business and for once it felt like I was getting the advice from the older sister I never had. It’s different than your mom telling you that you’re going to do great things, or telling you that every mistake has a purpose. It’s Amy telling you that everything is going to be alright. My favorite chapter of the book is the one where she talks about learning to love yourself. You think as a teen that your nose is too big, or your hips are too wide, or you hate the way that your hair curls when you let it air dry. But Amy talks about the things she hated about herself and how she learned to love every part of herself.

3.The Fault in Our Stars by John Green

This is one of my very favorite books. Is it cliche? maybe. But let me tell you why. I held off from reading this book for so long because I heard it was sad. I didn’t want to purposely read a book that was sad, why would I do that?? As time went on, I got curious that maybe I was missing out on something. So I went to Barnes & Noble and picked it up.

It was one of those books I could not put down. It’s young adult fiction, yes, but it’s a good one. I was a fan of John Green’s work before The Fault in Our Stars, but this one runs deep with me.

The story is well written, and the language is rich. This, however, isn’t my favorite part of the book. My favorite part of the book is the message. My favorite part of all of John Green’s books is the message. It has the kind of message that you have to dig a little deeper to find.

The message that life is full of little infinities. No matter how much time you have left on this earth, make every moment count. It’s a message you need to hear when you’re in your teens. It seems like every day goes by and it doesn’t matter, but one day you wake up wishing you could go back. Also the message that everyone deserves love is a sub message to the message of little infinities. Hazel is so hung up on the fact that she is terminally ill, she spends time pushing away people because she doesn’t want them to hurt if she suddenly declines quickly.

4.Paper Towns by John Green

This was the first book that I read by John Green, and it absolutely captivated me. I read it during my senior year of high school. I think time is of the essence with this book. I read it during the spring of my senior year, when things are starting to hit you that next school year will be completely different, and you let every day pass without thought, but tomorrow is one less day you have with your friends.

The book, as Green has said himself, has the intention to destroy the image of the dream girl. The main character, Quentin Jacobsen, referred to as Q, is infatuated with this girl that he thinks is absolutely perfect.

Margo, the object of Q’s infatuation, takes Q on an adventure he will never forget and tells him that she’s tired of people pretending to be something they’re not. She teaches Q that the worst thing a person can to is believe that a person is more than a person. As humans we all have faults and traits we’re not proud of. No person is absolutely perfect, nor should they be built up to the illusion that they are.

“Paper towns” in a literal sense of the word, is a phrase that means a city that is placed on a map as a way for cartographers to know if someone has stolen their map. They’re towns that are fake, but given the illusion to be real. In reference to the novel, it relates back to the message that we build up these idea about people and things we barely know only to have hopes shattered when we find they’re false.

5.Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer

My great aunt gave me this book before she passed away when I was in high school. She told me to read it and said it was an excellent novel. I had to take her word for it, she was a smart woman.

The story is based around the fictional account of 8 year old Oscar. Oscar loses his father in the 9/11 terror attacks in New York City. His father leaves behind a couple clues for Oscar, as they used to solve clues and puzzles together.

In his attempt to solve the puzzle his father left behind, Oscar finds himself traveling around the city, searching for a name he’s not sure who owns. As he travels around the city he meets new people he never would have encountered under any other circumstance.

This novel is one of my favorites because it shows that in cities of millions of people, every person has their own story. Also it shows the way that a good thing can come from something that is a terrible part of someone’s life, such as the loss of a parent.

It’s a great read, and is so worth it.

Why Growing Up in the Harry Potter Generation has Made Me a Better Person

If you’re around the age of 7 or above, you’re no stranger to J.K. Rowling’s record breaking Harry Potter series.

I, for one, was growing up in the heart of it. I read the first book when I was around 6 years old, sitting with my mom, reading each sentence slowly, and out loud. At the time, only 3 of the 7 books had been released. And the world was watching.

What was going to happen next? Was the boy who lived ever going to face He-who-must-not-be-named in person? Because Lord Voldemort is like dead, right? RIGHT?!?

I was 6 when the first movie came out in the movie theater. As I grew up, friends went to the midnight book releases– an event so popular, you were lucky to swipe a copy of JKR’s latest off the shelf at Barnes & Noble the next morning (Because your parents didn’t believe in staying up until midnight to get the book).

I read the first 3 books in anticipation for the 4th, the 4th for the 5th, and so on. I got the 7th book in my 13 year old hands the day it came out and read it in about a week.

And yes, while the series of a boy wizard captivated the attention of the world, and at face value it’s a story about a boy and his friends at a wizarding school trying to defeat a dark villain, it has shaped a generation of readers.

It’s a conversation starter. When I met my college roommate we covered all the bases of basic information. Then we figured out that we’re both avid readers. And our first love was Harry Potter. Now we occasionally have debates. Like the time we dropped finals studying to debate what happens to Buckbeak after the final book.

It builds character. It shows us that we don’t always agree with the ones we love, but have to sacrifice and do it for the greater good. Hermione doesn’t approve of all of Ran and Harry’s rule breaking in the first 2 books, but by the 3rd, we see her open up. We see her loosen up on herself, and do things for her best friends, because they’re her best friends. We learn that we have to do things for the greater good. Lupin has to sit back and watch Harry from afar in the 3rd book because Harry doesn’t know he’s his father’s old school pal and fellow member of the first order of the phoenix.

We see that those in authority aren’t right, because they have authority. As a child, you’re taught your whole life to listen to authority figures. In Harry Potter, we see that those who have authority don’t always have other’s best interest in mind. Professor Umbridge, for example, is one of the Harry Potter fandom’s favorites to hate on. In pink frills and lace, she is terrifying. Using her sickly sweet authority to oppress the students of Hogwarts on the terms that Harry Potter was a liar. Cornelius Fudge, the minister of magic until book 6, shows us how those who have ultimately the most authority are cowardly when it comes to their best interest.

It shows us how your family doesn’t have to be the ones you’re blood related to. Take Harry, for example. The only blood family he has remaining are the Dursleys. Despite this, he is eagerly welcomed into the burrow as one of the Weasley’s own children, Mcgonagall and Dumbledore always has an eye on him, and the marauders are watching over him. Though we don’t see Sirius Black until about halfway through the series, he looks out for Harry because he knows it’s what James and Lily would have wanted. Sirius in himself is a completely different story. As the only member of the house of Black to be sorted into Gryffindor, Sirius is basically outed from the family as a disgrace. He finds family in his very best friends, even taking the fall for where he knows Pettigrew fell short.

Man, house elf, centaur, or dragon, we all deserve to be treated as equals. It has been observed that perhaps the dedication Hermione has to S.P.E.W. and the treatment of house elves is a reflection of combating racism in society. Whether this is true or not, we see beasts oppressed by the wizards throughout the novels. The Centaurs are one of the prime examples, because their distrust of the wizards shows that there is history there. The way Firenze is outed from the centaurs because he befriends Dumbledore is one solid example.

Making the right choice won’t always be the easiest. At 14, Harry tries to convince the wizarding world that Voldemort was indeed back, and out with malicious intent. He was called a liar, a fake, and had his hand slapped for instilling fear in wizards across the country. But once you see the Dark Lord with your own eyes, wouldn’t you think that maybe, i don’t know, you should tell someone? He was constantly made the fool by the Daily Prophet, and teachers told him to stop telling lies. His friends told him they weren’t allowed to hang out with him. But he never waived despite being called a phony. (Also the entire wizarding world basically had to be personally hit in the face with dark magic to convince them.)

They say the literature impacts our behavior, and I can attest that this is true. When I was little, my role model was Hermione Jean Granger. I wanted to be smart like her. I carried a book with me wherever I went because of her. I spent hours reading. I loved my curly, wavy, messy hair.

That’s not to say I didn’t like traditional dolls and barbies, etc. I did. But having the  Harry Potter series influence my behaviors I think directly links to my character today. So thank you, J.K. Rowling, for giving our generation such an influential series of books.

7 Things I Learned From Putting My Friends First

Your girl squad is the group of friends that has stood by you since day 1. They’re the ones who have seen you at your best, your worst, and your absolutely ugliest moments. In return, you want to put them first… except when that cute guy you’ve been crushing on FOREVER finally asks you out. And he does, you’ll want to spend every second talking to him, and leave your girls in the dust. Here’s some things I learned from keeping my friends a priority, even while I was dating.

7. Your girlfriends won’t let you forget a single thing… in a good way: They’ll be oh-so-kind enough to remind you of the time you locked your dorm room key inside your room, the time you had too much to drink and tried to convince the squad you were fine (they were not convinced), the time your outfit was just not on pointe. They won’t let you forget a detail….but… in the most loving way possible.

6. They will never judge you for eating ice cream: They’ll never say “Really? a large?”, They’ll never say no to an ice cream date, they’ll never comment when you get chocolate on chocolate on chocolate. They know that when times are tough, ice cream is a girl’s best friend. Girlfriends take you out for ice cream to push you through a hard time, not try to impress you with a fancy credit card. Bud, it’s $3. I got this.

5. They won’t get mad when you do go on a date: In fact, they’ll go all mom on you and try to dress you perfectly and sit in the room as you curl your hair and try to look perfect. They’ll ask you a hundred times if you have your phone, wallet, and keys, and to call them if you need anything or if the date is terrible and you need to get picked up, like, ASAP. They’re proud of you and send you off like a proud mother, and not a jealous group of girls.

4. In the girl squad, you give and take: As much as you enjoyed your date night, next week it’s someone else’s turn. You have to be a supportive mama as you watch her get glam. Even if you are blue because your date didn’t turn out so well.

3. They’ll lend you the hand you need: “What’s that? you’re going to a party and need a neon pink shirt? I have one!” your friend will squeal excitedly as she pulls a top from her closet. You examine it, and gently turn her down as you realize her extra small isn’t going to fit your medium body. But her hair bow on the other hand might just be the perfect accessory.

2. Your Girlfriends are the ones you’ll make unforgettable memories with: If I had spent all my time with my boyfriend while we were dating, I would be forced to look back at that time of my life with a heavy heart. I didn’t, and so when I look back I think of the things like the time we had a sleepover and it started thundering, or the time we stayed up until one in the morning planning a surprise party for one of my friends, or the time we went to the mall just to try on  dresses.

1.Your girlfriends will be the people you need them to be: When you’re excited, they’re excited for you. When you’re blue, they’re standing by ready to open a can of whoop-ass. When you’re the only single friend, they’ll try to hook you up with the good, the bad, and the ugly. They don’t look back at that relationship as the time I forgot them, but the time I valued them as equals to my S.O.

Why The Message of Social Media Should Have Been to be Yourself to Begin With

By now you’ve probably heard of 18 year old instagram star Essena O’Neill–That is if you’ve had your ear to the ground. The teen announced this week that she was deleting her instagram account  of over 600,000 followers after claiming that the posts she claims took hundreds of shots to get and clothes she was paid to wear were all so fake. So why not stand behind this righteous teenager who is making the claim of being true to yourself?

Because with every “brave attempt” comes a counter fire.

Teens across the board are calling out the “brave attempt” and claiming that social media should always have been about being yourself. Shortly after O’Neill’s announcement, popular instagram account SocalityBarbie quit the race as well. For those unfamiliar, Socality Barbie was an account that used a Barbie doll to poke fun at the way that some people take instagram way too seriously. The account decided to discontinue posting, with the message that their job had been done. Which brings me to wonder when did social media become anything other than sharing a group pic of your friends with your Aunt you only see at Christmas, or sharing a pic of you hard at work with your friends from high school?

The bottom line: social media is what we make of it.

I’m a teen who grew up in the age where every social media platform was born, from MySpace to SnapChat. As a teen who lived through when Facebook was cool, then it wasn’t cool because everyone’s parents had one, to when it was cool again, I can attest to that social media should be about you. Just, the real you. Like the you that you are when you hang out with your friends.

Social media is openly another platform that gives us standards– That we didn’t necessarily ask for– to live by. We already have TV, movies, magazines, and models that create a standard. So why take something that is intended for fun, and make it as criminal as the standards already handed to us by society?

Social media is arguably fake. But it doesn’t have to be. Many accounts with millions of followers are endorsed by companies and people buy and sell accounts to get more followers. However, this shouldn’t stop you from posting what you want.

Why Leaving Home For School Might Just Be The Best Thing For You

It’s the most wonderful time of the year again– and no, I’m not talking about the holiday season.

I’m talking about college application season. High school seniors know what I’m talking about. Tis’ the season to be stressed as you balance school, extra curricular activities, taking SATs, trying to make time for family and friends, and College Applications.

Here’s a piece you may consider as you spend more time on the College Board website, and click between tabs of different colleges and universities on your browser: Getting away from home could be the best thing for you.

When I graduated from high school, I had friends that went across the country, and friends that chose the community college in my home town. It’s a personal choice, and you have to do what’s best for you.

Of course, a lot more factors into college than your final destination. You have to consider academic programs, cost, distance, and the like.

It’s food for thought. I chose to leave home. Like, get far away from home. Like, I made a mad dash from my high school after graduation.

I knew it was what was best for me. It’s not that I don’t love my parents, and don’t want to see them. It’s not that I didn’t have friends that I would miss, because the case is quite contrary. It’s a part of learning how to live on your own.

I have a tendency, let’s say, to try to avoid problems and conflict. That if I can’t do something, I’ll ask my mom for help. If I don’t know what to do, I’ll let it sit and stew for awhile while I try to figure it out. Being out-of-state and away from my parents has forced me to face problems, and not try to run away from them.

I could have chosen to go to school approximately 45 minutes away home, but instead I’m a full 7 hours away. I have to solve problems of life, such as how to make balanced meals on my own. (Because no matter how cool your dining options are at your dream school, you will get tired of them. It’s the truth.) I have to solve problems of getting around town and finding things on my own. (So if I go west of the university, I should hit a Target right? What do you mean Google maps is saying it will take 20 minutes to get there?!?)

It helps you enter the adult world. I know they say high school never ends, but at some point, you have to let go. When you go to college, no one cares that you were the star quarter back, the homecoming queen, the student body president, or the tuba player in the marching band. Sure, these are topics that will likely come up in conversation, but no one at your new school is going to bow down to the prom queen. That’s not to say you can’t keep up with your high school as a proud alumni, but check-ins now and then should be your maximum.

On that note, no one from college cares about what happened in high school. They don’t know your friends, they don’t know the atmosphere, and quite frankly, they just don’t care. Make new friends, and do things together that will make new memories. So when you’re dropped into a pool of all new faces, even out of state, you’ll find someone to eat with in the dining hall.

Being on my own (with a few really close friends!) Has forced me to take care of myself and manage my own problems. It’s strengthened my character (because you never forget the first time you accidentally shrink your favorite pajamas in the dryer) and I’ve proven to myself that I can, in fact, care for myself.

But you’ll figure it out, and if not, mom is always a phone call away.